forensic confirmation...

I found the bump on my head.

It's not so much a bump per se as the absence of other bumps. For reasons I cannot fathom I have always had a lumpy bumpy head, like my cranium couldn't make up it's mind about which direction to expand in. My mom always said I should go to one of those psychics who reads the bumps on your head to tell you things about your past and to forecast your future.

While I think that is a load of crap, this is not: the swollen spot on the back left side of my head eclpised all other bumps, making it kinda hard to notice. And it hurts when I press it, and I didn't notice that before--I just thought it was all the headaches I was having.

Of course it was the other way around, and the headaches were 'cos I fell and hit my head. And didn't remember it.

and then I also apparently ate it down a hill, which I'm sure didn't help the situation at all and prolly only exacerbated my hysteria.

Being a feminist kinda gal I usually dislike the word "hysteria" as it often denotes a kind of maddened wild upset particular to women--a upset that bears the stigma and connotation of being useless, lacking any objective sense, animalistic in its slavish response to emotion, and competely unreasonable. It's been misused, applied to situations where women's upset has been completely reasonable and entirely sensical. I hate this misuse, and I bristle at any mention of the word, sicne I usually view it as code for "stupid overemotional woman, I'd like to discredit her opinion."

I employ it in this case, however, as a totally appropriate use of the term, since I was operating in a vacuum of reason and had completely abandoned any objectivity or reasonability. I am going to assume this state was one part inebriation and one part concussion.

Time to lay off the sauce.
And, um, visit the chiropractor.